Home / 2009 / August (Page 2)

• Erin Andrews “Dirty” GQ Pics

  In Featured, More Sports

  

  And are they dirty…literally.

  Sorry ’bout that.

  But the title alone is probably good for a few hundred pageviews.

  Below are some pics of Erin Andrews, the lovely ESPN sideline reporter, and peephole victim, from GQ magazine.  The photos were taken back in April, well before the media firestorm surrounding Andrews and the peephole incident.

  She also gives GQ a rather bland interview…the only decent tidbit is that one day Andrews wants to cover the NFL.

  Here are a few more of the pics…

  

  

  

  You’re welcome.

   

• Greg Paulus Named ‘Cuse Starting QB

  In Featured, NFL

  

  The Greg Paulus Experiment is cruising right along in Syracuse, with news coming from head coach Doug Marrone that Greg Paulus, former Duke basketball star, has been named the University of Syracuse football team’s starting quarterback.

  Meh.

  This is either a testament to Paulus’ athletic ability, or a sign that Syracuse football has sunk to the lowest depths in the NCAA.

  Paulus, who is at Syracuse as a grad student, hasn’t played organized football in four years.  He beat out a freshman, a sophomore, and most surprising, former starter, senior Cam Dantley.

  Quick test ‘Cuse fans…who would you rather have as your starting QB?

  

  or

  

  Damn, it’s going to be another long, long football season for the pathetic Orangemen and their beleaguered fans.

   

• Coaches Spurrier and Zook Trying to Recruit…a Trumpet Player?

  In Featured, NCAAF

  Damn right they are…or aren’t.

  Well, Spurrier might be…remember, he coaches the University of South Carolina football team.

  The same school recently celebrated for it’s hapless mediocrity.

  OK, so Ron Zook of Illinois and Spurrier are not trying to recruit a trumpet player…it’s all just a mix-up.  Count Virginia Tech’s Frank Beamer as another coach with zero desire of suiting up a trumpet player, a la the Adam Sandler crapfest, “The Waterboy.”

  They would, however, love to have Ryan Miller, football player, on their squads…just not Ryan Miller, runner, trumpet player, and all-around band geek.  Seems a dumbass at a recruiting service that supplies coaches with addresses of potential prospects got Ryan Miller confused with Ryan Miller, but not Buffalo Sabres goalie Ryan Miller.

  Got it.

  “We were as dumbfounded as anyone,” says Derek Miller, whose only disappointment in the letters is that his alma mater, Florida State, never showed interest in his son. “Maybe it’s because we are naive to the recruiting process.”

  Still, the Millers have had fun with the recruiting process. Ryan admits to bragging to his friends, particularly those who play football, about the letters he received from Beamer and Illinois coach Ron Zook.

  But everything has been straightened out, and Ryan Miller, band geek, will be marching along at halftime somewhere, blowing the hell out of his trumpet, while Ryan Miller, football player, will be putting on the pads for some big-time college program…or even South Carolina.

  Hey, maybe Miller can even get Spurrier to pay attention to him…for a change.

  

  "She can have my Gamecock any day..."

   

• FAVRE! FAVRE! FAVRE! FAVRE! FAVRE!

  In Featured, NFL

  

  "God, I'm turning into a living joke!"Is still retired...for now.

  .

  Is still retired…for now.

  But, and I feel dirty for even bringing this up, there’s a vibe at the Minnesota Vikings training camp that it’s only a matter of time before his Royal Pain-in-the-Ass makes his grand, attention-whoring entrance…according to Jay Glazer of Fox Sports.

  However, and to show how just and fair I am, this “news scoop” as it were, was not initiated by Favre, or his agent Bus Cook.  Even Glazer has gone on record as saying it’s not a story per se, as a feeling he has from time spent at Vikings camp talking to players, and from time spent with team owner Zygi Wilf.

  And Glazer, showing off his keen-mind and sharp-eye, provides some points as to why his gut is feeling the way it is (and not from eating too many breakfast burritos) regarding Favre’s return.

  First he points to the general feeling of acceptance from the team that Favre’s return is imminent. Players are talking of Favre as if there’s a plan in place for his return.

  Two, Favre himself has yet to shut the door on a return to the NFL.  Sources close to Favre say he hasn’t yet made up his mind, and is still seeking advice from close friends.  Why else would he have gone ahead with arm surgery, and even now continue to work out, if he was planning to retire and relax on his ranch.

  Three, Sage Rosenfels and Tavaris Jackson have yet to impress in training camp, and Brad Childress is unhappy with the passing game thus far.

  Finally, Favre notoriously hates camp.  Plus, if he waits until the season starts he can come in and save the Vikings, like a knight on a white horse.

  Either way, this thing is dragging out way, way too long.  And unfortunately for Brett Favre, the longer this goes on, the more it tarnishes his legacy.  If he would’ve stuck with the Packers, or retired before his season with the Jets, he would’ve been a legend.  Now, with the drama and mystery surrounding his possible return, he’s turning into a living  joke.

  UPDATE:  Multiple sources (including ProFootballTalk) are reporting that Favre is to sign with the Vikings today.  Rumor has it that the deal is one year, $12 million dollars.  Not bad for a 74-year-old, grey-haired QB.  Somewhere Jay Glazer is yelling at the top of his lungs “SUCK IT, LOSERS…I TOLD YA SO!”  Glazer is my god.

  Goddamn I hope this means the Brett Favre Media Circus is over until next year.

   

• Suck It Haters…Jeter Breaks All-Time Shortstop Hits Record

  In Featured, MLB

  

  Sorry Jeter haters, but the  Yankees shortstop achieved another milestone the other night on his way to a Hall of Fame career.

  With three hits in a loss to the Seattle Mariners on Sunday night, Jeter passed Hall of Famer Luis Aparicio for most hits by a shortstop.  Aparicio had held the record with 2673.

  Jeter now sits at 2675 for his career, and there’s very little chance he won’t reach the 3000 hit milestone before his career is over.  No Yankee in history has 3000 hits…not Ruth, not Gehrig, not DiMaggio, not Berra, not even Hensley Meulens.

  So suck it Jeter fans…call him overrated, call him a defensive liability, call him gay, call him whatever you want, the dude is Hall of Fame bound (unless we find out he’s been on the juice).

  Plus he’s nailed the following chicks…

  Mariah Carey (annoying, terrible singer…nice boobs)
  Joy Enriquez (backup singer for Carey, actress…nice boobs)
  Jordana Brewster (actress “Fast and the Furious”)
  Vanessa Minillo (former Miss Teen USA, in 2006 #15 on Maxim’s Hot 100)
  Adriana Lima (Brazilian supermodel, all-around hotness)
  Jessica Alba (fap, fap, fap, fap, fap, fap…need I say more)
  Vida Guerra (model/singer/actress/hotness)
  Jessica Biel (mmmmmmm…)

  Currently he’s dating superfine Minka Kelly, so he’s got that going for him too…which is nice.

  Suck it even more Jeter haters…I’d take any of those chicks over the MVP any day.

   

• Usain Bolt Crushes 100 m Record

  In Featured, More Sports

  Usain Bolt.

  9.58 seconds.

  Holy shit.

  100 m in 9.58 seconds.

  Think about this…American sprinter Tyson Gay came in second, in 9.71 seconds, which up until a year ago was a world record.  Of course, that was before Bolt came on the scene and dominated at the Beijing Olympics, setting the world record in the 100 m at 9.69 sec.

  As awesome as Bolt is, I’m curious to see how much better he can be.

  Is 9.4 seconds possible?

  I wouldn’t put anything past Bolt right now.

  Here’s the race…

  
  Once again…wow.

   

• Men Everywhere Cross Their Legs and Weep Silently for Adrian Beltre

  In Featured, MLB

  

  Baseball injuries are usually run-of-the-mill things like pulled hamstrings, groin injuries, strained shoulders, etc.

  But sometimes they’re just friggin’ horrible.

  Just ask Mariners 3rd baseman Adrian Beltre, who finds himself on the disable list due to a most unfortunate, funny-but-scary type of injury.  In last night’s Seattle game, Beltre, while manning third, took a ground ball in the most unkindest (for men anyway) of places…his sack.

  Did I mention Beltre doesn’t wear a cup.

  That sound you hear is a million guys simultaneously crossing their legs and making whimpering noises.

  Click on the pic for official injury update…

  

  Nothing says funny like a ball to the nuts…until you hear how seriously hurt Beltre really is.  Seems there was some tearing of the testicle (OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW OW!!!!) and some internal bleeding (not good).  The team said it is going to wait to see if Beltre requires surgery or not, and depending on what transpires, his season may be finished. [Seattle Times]

   

• Minka Kelly and Kate Hudson Don’t Like Each Other…Awesome Cat Fight to Come?

  In Featured, MLB

  

  This story I’m about to tell you, about two high profile Yankees girlfriends, at first might not seem like much.  Maybe just a little cattiness between the arm candy of Derek Jeter and Alex Rodriguez.

  But think of the possibilities.

  A story from Page Six of the New York Post alleges that Jeter’s succulent peach of a girlfriend, Minka Kelly, best known for Friday Night Lights and supersized hotness, and A-Rod’s ever tasty, soon-to-be seed bearing squeeze Kate Hudson, best known for cute sexiness, Almost Famous, and being way hotter than her haggard-looking mother ever was, do not like each other.

  According to an insider, there’s a definite tension existing between the two.

  “There’s been visible coldness between Minka and Kate,” an insider told The Post’s Lachlan Cartwright. “I don’t know if it’s a personal thing, or just an extension of the ongoing A-Rod-Jeter rivalry.”

  If the player’s wives have anything to say about who they prefer, the early returns are favoring Hudson.  Sweet Kate has given up her private box to sit in the family seats with the wives of pitchers AJ Burnett and CC Sabathia.  She’s also gotten the nod of approval from Johnny Damon’s wife and Jorge Posada’s spouse as well.

  No big deal right.  Simple petty jealousy between two Hollywood prima donnas right.

  I got two words that will blow your mind.

  Cat fight.

  Giggidity.

  Have a gander at the following pics of these two starlets, and imagine a Pay-Per-View event…one night only.  Clash of the Titans.  The Cat Fight of the Century.

  

  I have to go touch myself inappropriately now…feel free to do the same. [NY Post]

   

• Apparently Some Mexican Soccer Fans Aren’t Very Nice

  In Featured, More Sports

  

  Soccer, or football as it’s known in Europe, is called the beautiful game.

  It’s fans, however, are known as hooligans.

  Alright, not all soccer fans are drunk, brawling, toothless animals…just the majority.

  And no, it’s not stereotyping if you’ve got well over a thousand examples of soccer fans out of control.

  And if you’re Landon Donovan of the United States Men’s National Team, then the Mexican fans are the worst.

  In a World Cup qualifying match played the other night between the U.S. and Mexico, a couple Mexican fans put on a vile display of soccer fanaticism, so disgusting in fact that it made me sick.  And I’ve seen “Failure to Launch.”

  Twice.

  The man with the tri-colored mohawk took a swig of beer, stuck his fingers down his throat and vomited the mixture back into his cup. In the next seat another man, who was wearing a T-shirt with a cartoon drawing of the decapitated heads of Barack Obama and Landon Donovan, poured out what remained of the Corona beer he had been chugging and urinated into his cardboard drinks container.

  First off, I hope the guy puking into his cup had good aim, otherwise I’d feel awful bad for the dude sitting in front of him.  Secondly, the prick in the Obama/Donovan shirt is a dick…never, never pour out beer.  Ever.  Dumbass soccer fan.

  Then, according to a neutral bystander who witnessed these disgusting acts, the pair stood on their seats, high-fived and hurled their vile concoctions in the direction of Donovan, the United States men’s national team star who was preparing to take a corner kick 15 yards away.

  Wow.

  In the States an act like that would be criminal…in Mexico, it’s called team spirit. [Yahoo Sports]

   

• Heads Up A-Rod…Kate’s Got Baby Fever

  In Featured, MLB

  

  Methinks Alex Rodriguez is in for more hurt than a Josh Beckett fastball to the nuts.  Seems his girlfriend, the lovely Kate Hudson, is getting the itch.

  For a baby.

  Nothing says “let’s cement our 3 month old relationship” than getting knocked up.  But in Kate’s defense, she is at that age (30) when women start thinking of having a child, and Rodriguez is the poor bastard caught in the line of fire.

  According to In Touch, Hudson wants a sibling for her 5-year-old son Ryder, her kid with ex-husband, and major dirtbag Chris Robinson. But Rodriguez, who has 2 daughters with ex-wife Cynthia, don’t want no more kids…right now, anyway.

  At least not until science comes up with a way for the egotistical douchebag to impregnate himself.