I’m going to go out on a limb here and say this guy didn’t think this through.  I mean, if you’re going to lie to try and extort money out of someone, you gotta make it at least somewhat believable.

Herbert Alex Simpson of Philadelphia, is a blackmailing douchebag.  Only thing is, Tom Coughlin called his bluff, and now Simpson is facing charges.  Apparently Herbert sent threatening letters to Coughlin, in an attempt to get the Giants coach to pay him $20,000 to $30,000.  His threat?  To expose a fictitious sexual encounter between Coughlin and two women.

Notice I said fictitious–so you can just clear that horrific image of Tom Coughlin in a wild, greasy threesome.  Or maybe you’d be into that.  Whatever.  Who am I to judge?  I masturbate to amputee midget porn.

Officially, Simpson pleaded guilty to two counts of mailing threatening communications.

Unofficially, he’s guilty of being incredibly stupid–and a major dick. [NJ.com]