Home / 2010 / October

• Texas High School Football Game Ends After 12 Overtimes

  In Featured, NCAAF

  

  To say that people in the state of Texas take their high school football seriously is a gross understatement.  They’re crazy for it, with an almost religious zeal, and I dig that.

  So, a bunch of fans must have been in heaven this past Friday night when a game between the Nacogdoches Dragons and Jacksonville Indians went an amazing 12 overtimes before a winner was eventually declared.  The fact that the game had playoff implications only added to the fervor.

  The teams were tied at 28 at the end of regulation time.  A dozen overtime sessions later, and the final score was 84-81 in favor of Jacksonville, thanks to a 19-yard field goal by the Indians Rodrigo Carreon.  And if scoring 81 points and losing wasn’t bad enough, the Dragons were also eliminated from playoff competition in District 14-4A.

  Double ouch.

  Some facts and figures from this epic struggle…

  • unofficially more than 1,000 total yards were amassed in the game
  • the teams combined for 60 first downs
  • the game lasted 5 1/2 hours, ending just before 1 a.m. Saturday morning
  • Nacogdoches had 11 turnovers in the game, with their last one, a fumble, setting up Jacksonville’s game winning touchdown
  • the National High School Record Book lists two games that went nine overtimes, so consider this one the longest high school game in recent history

  That there is a lot of football for two teams to play in just under six hours.  I’m sure fluid replacement was at a premium, for both players and fans alike.  Can’t imagine doing anything for nearly six hours straight, let alone something as physical and strenuous as football, unless you count sleeping as an activity.

  Still, couldn’t there be a better alternative to playing 12 overtimes in one game, like, oh I don’t know, six overtimes and a game of horseshoes?  Or five overtimes followed by best 2 out of 3 in Yahtzee?  Sudden death like the NFL?

  Considering that last option, 12 overtimes doesn’t seem so outrageous, now does it?

  [Daily Sentinel, SF Gate]

   

• Brett Favre’s Dong Wins the 2010 Adult Halloween Costume Contest

  In Featured, NFL

  
  
  I should have clarified my earlier post when I labeled Little Ron Washington the 2010 Halloween costume contest winner. That little bundle of awesomeness is clearly a winner, but for now we’ll put him in the juvenile category, for ages 6-12.

  That’s so we can name this guy’s Brett Favre Dong costume the Halloween costume contest winner for the adult age group. I’d say this guy went balls out like Little Ronny did, but that’s pretty obvious when you see the picture.

  

  Once again, well played young man. Of course no picture of a guy dressed up as an athlete’s penis is complete without that ambiguously gay duo from Sesame Street, Bert and Ernie.

  Little known fact about buddy’s costume—that is an exact replica of Favre’s dong, only magnified 400,000,00 times, which is my clever way of saying that Brett Favre’s dong is terribly small (allegedly).

  Head over to Guyism for the rest of the picture set.

  [H/T to Guyism]

   

• The Nashville Predators Halloween Rap is a Quirky Delight

  In Featured, NHL

  

  Word has it that the Nashville Predators debuted this Halloween rap this past Thursday against the St. Louis Blues, and from what I’m hearing, it went over quite well.

  The video is one of those JibJab creations, and if you really love it (and you will), you can head over to their site and make your own.

  Here’s the rundown of characters and the players portraying them, just so there’s no confusion.

  • Shea Weber as Frankenstein
  • Joel Ward as the DJ/Bride of Frankenstein
  • Jordan Tootoo as Dracula
  • Pekka Rinne as the Mummy
  • Steve Sullivan as the Witch

  Video follows the jump…

  The only thing missing was Barry Trotz as the werewolf.  Seriously, was that too much to ask?

  Happy Halloween everyone—stay safe, and don’t bother coming round my house, as I won’t be handing out candy, but rather hiding in the bushes with the hose ready to spray potential pranksters and attractive mothers, as I do every year.

  [H/T to Out of Bounds]

   

• Courtside Seats to the Heat’s Home Opener Going for $25,000

  In Featured, NBA

  

  As if you needed yet another example of the drawing power of the Heat’s big three of LeBron, Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh, look no further than the going rate for a pair of courtside tickets to Miami’s home opener tonight against the Orlando Magic.

  A cool $25,000, or the cost equivalent of a new midsized sedan.

  That’s a far cry from the last few lean years, when the Heat would have to pull off something like retiring Tim Hardaway’s jersey on opening night to make sure they had a sellout.

  Yep, they’ve come a long way in one offseason.

  Please to explain, Miami Herald…

  In what’s always been considered a football town, the Heat are hotter than perhaps ever before. A pair of courtside seats to the game against Orlando sold on StubHub.com for the whopping sum of $25,884, company spokesman Glenn Lehrman said.

  StubHub’s data showed that the average price for any seat was $325. For last year’s opener against New York – and remember, the Knicks have a strong fan base in Miami with all the transplanted New Yorkers, plus are a draw because of the history between the franchises – the average ticket price was a mere $50, Lehrman said.

  Now I’m sure that tickets for the Heat’s remaining home games won’t be in the same stratosphere as the opener against Orlando, but it’s safe to say that they’ll be pricey nonetheless, courtside or otherwise.  If you’re one of those unlucky schmucks who doesn’t have an extra $25,000 lying around the house, and you absolutely, positively must see a Heat home game, then here’s a free tip—you can live with only one kidney, and if you’re a kidney down to begin with, dialysis isn’t the worst thing in the world.

  Trust me, I know.

  /front row seats for Spandau Ballet’s reunion tour was totally worth my left kidney

  [Miami Herald]

   

• Fireman Ed Off the Hook for Assaulting Giants Fan During Preseason Game

  In Featured, NFL

  

  Remember back in the preseason when the Jets and Giants officially opened the New Meadowlands Stadium.  Being that it was just the preseason, the most memorable thing about that night was a somewhat physical confrontation between attention-seeking Jets uber-fan Fireman Ed, and an Amani Toomer jersey wearing Giants fan, later identified as Christopher Black.

  I say somewhat because it was nothing more than some light shoving and misplaced aggression between two douchebags whose machismo was too grandiose to fit in an 82,566 seat stadium.

  The incident itself wasn’t that big a deal, except that Black ended up pressing assault charges against Fireman Ed (real name: Ed Anzalone).  Black himself was charged with disorderly conduct.

  Well, Fireman Ed can sleep easy now, after Black decided to drop the assault charges yesterday.  Black’s charges of disorderly conduct will be dismissed as well, only six months from now, providing he completes an anger management course.

  “Both parties are happy, and both sides made amends with each other,” said Black’s lawyer, Alexander Iler.

  And the Circle of Life in the land of meatheads is complete.

  [NY Daily News]

   

• College vs. High School Epic Announcer Meltdowns…Who Ya Got?

  In Featured, NCAAF

  
  
  A pair of football announcer meltdowns have been circulating on these here internets the past couple of days, and as usual, I’m late getting to the party showcasing these brilliant performances.
  
  
  Epic is an adjective that’s sometimes thrown around way too frequently, but these after listening to these guys go off over some terribly questionable calls, to not say that they’re epic would be some sort of crime against nature, or something.
  
  
  The first of these announcer rants took place during the Florida Atlantic-Arkansas State game last weekend. FAU QB Jeff Van Camp was flushed out of the pocket, scrambled for a few yards before sliding feet first. Van Camp was hit in the head by an Arkansas State defender during the slide, a hit which actually knocked the QB’s helmet off. What followed was this rage filled, yet hilarious response from Florida Atlantic color announcer Dave Lamont. If you’ve ever wondered what Dave Lamont sounds like when he’s losing his mind, listen up.

  If you don’t think Lamont’s rant is epic, then I’ll fight any one of you who disagrees with me, that’s the mood I’m in at the moment.

  Seriously though, I’m so glad that Lamont was able to ignore that little voice in the back of his mind telling him that he should calm down. At least he had the good sense to realize that he was melting down at that moment, and smart enough to calm the f–k down before his head literally exploded in the press box.

  The second one takes place during a game between a couple of high schools in Massachusetts, the Abington Green Wave and the Rockland Bulldogs. The game itself was of utmost importance since both schools were 6-0 heading into the pivotal matchup. During the 4th quarter, Rockland had the ball at midfield when they ran a play where the QB threw a quick pass to the receiver who was lined up behind the line of scrimmage. Only thing was, the pass was a bit high, and the receiver wasn’t able to bring it in. An Abington player scooped up the loose ball, which should have been ruled a live ball since it was a backwards pass, and ran it in for a touchdown. Only the refs didn’t see it like that, called the play an incomplete pass, and gave the ball back to the Bulldogs. It’s pretty obvious by the reaction from both the play-by-play guy and the color commentator that they are Abington supporters. They both lose their sh-t over the horrible call, but the color guy’s outburst is way over the top.

  2010_1022_Abington_vs_Rockland_Touchdown_Nullified from Norm Caseley on Vimeo.

  Absolute best line—”Nuts and bolts, we got screwed.” Thankfully nobody was threatened with physical violence during this pair’s tirade.

  Both meltdowns are awesome in their own way, but for my money, Dave Lamont’s outburst is the winner. Both had passion, and lots of screaming, but Lamont’s went that extra mile when he challenged his press box compatriots to a throwdown. Anytime the threat of fisticuffs is involved, you know a guy means serious business.

   

• Little Ron Washington Wins the 2010 Halloween Costume Contest

  In Featured, MLB

  

  It’s all there—the mustache, the male pattern baldness, the coke residue on the rim of the nostrils.  Yep, this little Ron Washington went balls out with this costume.  Well played little man, well played indeed.

  Plus he’s already a step ahead for next year’s costume.  Lose the lip hair, pack on a few pounds, throw on a cheap NBC windbreaker, and this kid can go as everyone’s favorite chubby weatherman, Al Roker.  Skoal!

  And while you bask in the awesomeness of Little Ron here, click on this link to listen to the Ron Washington Drop Montage.  It’s a blast, and most assuredly the finest butchering of the English language you will here all day…Ron Washington style of course.

  [H/T to Midwest Sports Fans]

   

• NBA Shows Off Its Pettiness, Bans Upside Down Headbands

  In Featured, NBA

  

  According to their slogan, the NBA is where amazing happens.  It’s also where new lows in pettiness happen.

  The NBA, in its infinite wisdom, has taken the unprecedented step to make the wearing of upside down headbands illegal.

  Seriously.

  About a decade ago headbands came back into vogue in the league.   Not wanting to miss a glorious marketing opportunity, the league mandated that players had to wear league issued headbands, the ones that featured the NBA logo.  Players were subject to fines if they wore any other type of headband.

  To stick it to the man, some players (see Wallace, Rasheed) wore their headbands inside out, until the league put a stop to that.  Rajon Rondo took to wearing his headband upside down, and many other players followed suit.  Rondo was still within league rules as it pertained to the headband policy, the only difference being the silhouette of Jerry West faced south instead of the usual north.

  Not a big deal, right?

  Most people would say no, but those people aren’t the brain trust that runs the NBA.  Probably because of Rondo being on the Celtics, and the national exposure that comes with it, the league, for some strange, albeit petty, reason, politely asked Rondo not to wear his headband in that manner.  You’d think the NBA would have bigger fish to fry, but no, apparently Rajon Rondo’s upside down headband was a major concern.

  Now two games into the new season, and Rondo has dumped the headband altogether.  Kind of odd seeing him out on the court without it—almost like he’s not quite himself sans headband.  Thankfully losing the headwear hasn’t affected the stellar point guard’s play.

  What’s next for the NBA, outlawing double knots on player’s shoes?  League issued jock straps with the NBA logo on it?  At this point nothing would surprise me.

  [H/T to Ball Don't Lie]

   

• San Francisco Pot Dispensary Offering Free Weed for Giants Homers

  In Featured, MLB

  

  Hands down, and I mean hands down, this is absolutely, positively THE…GREATEST…PROMOTION…EVER!

  ReLeaf Herbal Center, a medical marijuana dispensary located in San Francisco, is prepared to give one sweet doobie to their San Francisco loving patients for every homer the Giants hit in the World Series.

  That’s right—one homer, one joint.  Five homers, five joints.  Ten homers…well, you get the picture.

  But the cannabis love doesn’t stop there.

  ReLeaf is also offering a “bright orange” strain of ganja, as well as a THC-infused orange drink called “Giant Punch” at a discounted price to their patients.  Why does that sound like, without ever having seen or tasted it, the most awesome drink ever created?

  Almost makes me wish I lived in San Francisco, and was sick enough to qualify for medical marijuana.  But not quite.

  No word on how the clinic plans on combating the munchies that invariably occurs with consumption of free weed, but in keeping with the orange theme, I’m guessing Doritos…lots and lots of Doritos.

  [H/T to Babes Love Baseball]

   

• Amateur Soccer Player Tries to Run Down Ref After Red Card

  In Featured, More Sports

  

  Pictured here is Joseph Rimmer, a 28-year-old amateur British soccer player who carries around some serious anger issues.  Sure, he looks like a friendly bloke on the outside, but just wait until you book him for a red card.

  While playing for Lonsdale of the Southport and District Sunday league, Rimmer was given a red card and sent off by referee David Harkness.

  Rimmer graciously accepted his punishment and left the pitch with a quiet dignity about him.  Just kidding, he went to the parking lot, hopped in his car, drove it onto the field, and tried running over referee Harkness.

  Don’t make me give you a yellow card, Liverpool Echo…

  The referee was able to get out the way of the oncoming car and was not harmed in the incident.

  But it is understood Rimmer then got out his car and shouted threats at him before driving away.

  Wearing a shirt and tie, shaven-headed Rimmer yesterday appeared for trial at Liverpool Crown Court charged with affray and dangerous driving on February 14.

  Being that this happened in England, and much of what I know of the country comes from watching Benny Hill reruns, I’ll just assume that Rimmer’s chasing of the ref was in super-fast speed, with Yakety Sax playing in the background.

  At least that’s how I hope it happened.

  [Liverpool Echo via Out of Bounds]