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1974 Letter From the Cleveland Browns to a Disgruntled Fan is Legendary

By Jeff Greenwell / 28 comments

Back in 1974, one Cleveland Browns fan, and season ticket holder, took issue with the practice of fans and their throwing of paper airplanes. The moron drafted and sent a letter to the Cleveland front office, citing possible eye and/or ear damage, along with a thinly-veiled reference to possible litigation, as a way of expressing his displeasure with the fans and this particular activity.

Here is that actual letter from 1974…

And here is the epic response, courtesy of the Cleveland Browns front office…

BOOM…ROASTED! That is so well played, reminds me of how great this country was before we were taken over by our politically correct overlords.

Wonder if the Mets will adopt this as their new form letter for fans who inquire about seasons tickets?

[Cleve Scene via Deadspin]

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About the author: Jeff Greenwell

Jeff Greenwell is the writer/editor of Last Angry Fan. Jeff has been known to rock a Speedo while belting out Robert Goulet tunes from his front porch, and in his spare time he enjoys capturing and training feral goats to be his minions. Also known to dig a nice brick of cheese from time to time.

Website: http://lastangryfan.com

Editor's Picks

http://twitter.com/DupontCircleDC DC

Definitely the greatest response ever. I’ve been trying to find info on either of these guys (i.e., what they are doing in 2010, if they’re alive) and haven’t found anything yet.
- Clevelander
  
  Art Modell is still in Baltimore I think. (He was CC’d on the communication)
- Delavigne
  
  Dude, You must not have looked very hard. The moron lives in Idaho and is still a Lawyer.
  - http://twitter.com/DupontCircleDC DC
    
    I did see the Idaho guy but wasn’t sure he was the same guy. I mean, who moves to Idaho. Also he was inactive — probably too old to practice now.
- Stork
  
  The man who sent the letter is my grandfathers college roomate and he is still alive
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http://www.burning-river.net Joecephus

AWESOME!
Zpavic83

Would have been funny to send a sheet of paper with dotted lines for folding into an airplane
http://www.facebook.com/qnetter Roger Klorese

Wow, that’s lame. Just the sort of response I’d expect from a wimpy lawyer douchebag who couldn’t get on the team so has to puff up his chest and play more-macho-than-thou. Probably told strangers he was “with the Browns” without even admitting he was a douchebag lawyer.
- Stop talking.
  
  Please don’t talk anymore. You’re embarrassing yourself
- General Counsel
  
  Dear Roger,
  I feel that you should be aware that someone is creating douchebag posts and signing your name.
- Anon
  
  i cant decide if this guy is the most amazing troll ever or is simply a failure at life
- Jbirke2
  
  Somehow, Roger, you pathetic limpdick, I suspect you couldn’t have gotten into Podunk Law School if you sucked off everyone in the admissions office. Which I’m sure you did.
- ROGERHATER
  
  YOU LOOK UGLY. I HATE YOUR FACE.
  IF YOUR LIFE HAD A FACE I WOULD PROBABLY PUNCH IT JUST LIKE IM DOING THE KEYBOARD RIGHT NOW BECAUSE IM SO ANGRY IM PUNCHING WORDS INTO EXISTENCE SOLELY BY SMASHING MY FIST AGAINST IT.
  
  IF I WERENT FOAMING AT THE MOUTH RIGHT NOW ID TELL YOU THAT I SADIFHA8!! SIHFE8ON2XUB!! IWHFUBFWIUH UBCWAUB FA;3RLM4-02 ‘DFOJFKLN S98IWN 42AR.
  
  GOD IM SOOOOOOOOOOO ANGRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.
- Stang2691
  
  Hey Roger,
  
  Did you ever meet one of those people who just did not get it. You know the people that just do not fit into society (example Unabomber). Congratulations you are the holder of today’s winning ticket.
  
  Wow you really do not get it.
- Bclark8
  
  No, he probably told people he was “the general counsel for the Cleveland Browns” just to hear the sound of every girl in the room getting a little wet. Unlike that guy Roger Klorese who tells people he’s a meaningless fuckboy who works a shitty office job with so much down time he can comment on letters that were written fort years ago so that he can hear the sound of peoples’ feet as they walk away from him before he finishes his sentence.
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1324460024 Joseph Stratton

Cleveland OWNED Akron even back in 1974.

Then LeDouchebag got us back….the prick.
Ted Bohannon

http://www.sconet.state.oh.us/AttySvcs/AttyReg/Public_AttorneyDetails.asp?ID=44988
Pepper

This was vintage Art Modell but the response was coined from Ohio’s Senator Steve Young.

Pepper
Jwaldron

Yes; the thing that made our country great was calling someone an asshole. That makes perfect sense.
- Poppy
  
  No… Standing up to morons made our country great. Or perhaps you think protecting innocent fans from the dangers of paper airplanes is a truly worthwhile cause?
got6noudontbutwedo

I’m from Pittsburgh and I hate Cleveland but that was well played by national standards not just Cleveland standards (sorry had to take my shot nothing personal Cleveland) I tip my cap to you sir.
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George_fairlane

the fan could write back and say “dear sir, in the future some @$$hole will be selling your team off by inpersonating someone who cares about cleveland” f*** art modell
I hate roger too!

Classic!!!
Heinerkin

And THAT is why Art Modell needs to be inducted into the NFL Hall of Fame!
OpusX

Priceless, if it’s real. LMAO!!!
Sage Mclaughlin

Political correctness has nothing to do with that. It’s astonishing to me that even though everybody in the West lives under the rule of PC, easily half of those people have no idea what it even IS, thinking it simply means “excessive politeness.”

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