Being Attacked by a Naked Bodybuilder Isn’t as Much Fun as You’d Think

Coming home from a party to find a 300-pound bodybuilder on your front porch is unsettling enough, but when said bodybuilder is naked and full of steroid-fueled rage, things tend to go rather quickly from unsettling to downright terrifying, especially when the nude muscleman goes berserk and attacks you and your spouse.

Such is the case of an unnamed couple in Colton, California who were savagely beaten by Ruben Arzu, the 22-year-old hulking bodybuilder with a fondness for steroids, a distaste for clothes, and some serious anger management issues. 

Cops say Arzu attacked the husband after he confronted the naked man stationed outside of his house.  The 36-year-old suffered serious head trauma as the result of Arzu’s assault.  The injured man’s wife went inside the house to call 911, and when she came out to check on her spouse’s condition, cops say Arzu picked her up off the ground and threw her, causing injuries to her head and face.

From the AJC

“The couple showed up at home from a party and he’s there in their front yard, naked,” said Colton police Officer Todd Smith, adding that the victims did not know Arzu.

Police said Arzu attacked the husband and caused major head trauma after the 36-year-old man confronted him.

The 34-year-old woman ran inside the house and called 911. When she came back out to check on her husband, Arzu picked her up and threw her around, causing facial injuries and multiple cuts to her head, Smith said.

Before officers arrived, a neighbor came out of her house to try and help the woman but ran back inside when Arzu turned to confront her, Smith said.

Wise move on the neighbor’s part, and probably a very easy decision once she witnessed the carnage created at the hands of Ruben Arzu.  It took four police officers two stun gun blasts and four sets of handcuffs to restrain the powerful bodybuilder.  Various reports state that Arzu was under the influence of—are you ready for it—steroids and other drugs, although the Colton police department would not, or could not confirm these reports, so they must be treated as hearsay.  Probably more fact than hearsay, but at this time it must be considered hearsay nonetheless.

The couple was released from hospital on Tuesday, and learned a tough but valuable lesson when it comes to interacting with naked bodybuilders found in or around your house, apartment, lodge or dwelling.




About the author: Jeff Greenwell


Jeff Greenwell is the writer/editor of Last Angry Fan. Jeff has been known to rock a Speedo while belting out Robert Goulet tunes from his front porch, and in his spare time he enjoys capturing and training feral goats to be his minions. Also known to dig a nice brick of cheese from time to time.



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